Sunday, October 12, 2008

MEDIOCRITY IN STUNNING HIGH DEFINITION

OK, I have taken a bit of a lengthy blog break, and with the endless amount of significant material to contemplate at this junction in history I must ask for forgiveness for the following indulgence...

Why, in the name of all that is sacred and pure did some studio executive think it was necessary to transfer the movie "Short Circuit" into high definition? More importantly, why did the movie channel recently feel compelled to support this monstrosity and play it recently when I was hoping for a remastered Stanley Kubrick classic instead?

Was it really essential to relive the moment of Number 5's self actualization ("Number Five is alive!") or watch Steve Guttenberg's everyman performance in stunning 108op display resolution? Is there not some bottom line standard of decency or taste to dictate that perhaps something that was so excruciating horrible in the first place need not be upgraded to a new format?

Is it not reasonable to conclude that in some instances it may be a tad superfluous to transfer something to high def that was never intended for it? I mean, I would love a high definition transfer of "My Dinner With Andre" as much as the next person, but perhaps I can find the strength to enjoy Andre Gregory and Wallace Shawn's metaphysical musings and conversations about the New York art scene in simple standard definition. Just a thought.

Anyways, please put a stop to this madness. As a rule of thumb I would like to suggest that any film "starring" Steven Guttenberg (sorry Police Academy fans) not be transferred to high definition. In the standard format it is frightening enough, though in high definition it is glaring monstrosity that I wouldn't wish to inflict on anybody.

12 comments:

mellowlee said...

*laughing* For once, I'm glad I do not have a HD Television!

I'm glad you're back! I've been wanting to thank you for getting me hooked on Mad Men!

I've caught up to the current episode in less than a month! I'm really enjoying it. It's crazy to see people walking around smoking everywhere; including while putting the kids to bed, while doing dishes etc.

While I was born in the 70s, I still remember then my mother sending me to the corner store to buy her cigarettes. My how things have changed even since then!

I hope you had a good long weekend
*cheers*

Westcoast Walker said...

Hey Mellowlee - it's always great to have you drop by - I glad you like Mad Men, it is well written and acted and there is definitely a dark undercurrent underneath the "Swell" exterior.

As for high def - while it is certainly awe inspiring with some films, though there are indeed many missives - basically crap is crap no matter how glossy you make it, which was sorta my point I suppose.

hope your long weekend was great too!

Allison said...

Funny, I was just talking about Police Academy last night. I do kinda sorta, enjoy those films. Everyone needs questionable cheese now and again. ;)

Bill Stankus said...

The story goes ... Ted Turner, owner of too many great films, was about to colorize The Maltese Falcon, Casablanca and other classic black and white films.

Jane Fonda, then married to Ted, got on his case and convinced him to leave the black and whites alone. He did.

I don't know Ted or Jane but when I read about the Casablanca story I wondered if Fate was involved ... that Jane's time with Ted was singularly for the purpose of saving old movies.

Who is now out there to make good decisions on transfers to HiDef?

robyn bright said...

eegads I LOVED Short Circuit! when I was a kid! :-) Must be my inner geek!

Liberality said...

and why, oh why, oh why do they play so much garage at all. there are plenty of really excellent films but it seems that all they usually show is garbage--which is why I usually won't watch television at all.

Comrade Kevin said...

I agree.

Next Roy Schneider films will be viewed on blue-ray and HD.

Dean Wormer said...

Ha! Although I love that movie. Guilty pleasure. My dad watched them film a bunch of scenes from his office up at Bonneville Dam (he was an engineer with the army corps of engineers.)

Personally I think there's a bunch of stuff that doesn't need the HD or even DVD treatment. Most of it television stuff.

mellowlee said...

One episode that KILLED me was when Joan was busy helping out the new TV department read scripts. She was really enjoying it, and then comes in one day to find she's been replaced, and expected to show the new guy everything she knows. I felt that in the pit of my stomach OUCH :O(

Barbara Bruederlin said...

Haha how true! If anything was ever a waste of HD, it's a Steve Guttenberg movie. Like putting lipstick on a pig.

Westcoast Walker said...

Thanks for the comments all.

A point of interest, someone thought it would be grand to create a "reimagined" Short Circuit for the 21st century. Check IMDB and be amazed (there is even a thread posted lamenting the absence of Guttenberg being attached to this project). I kid you not.

Dale said...

I've wondered the same thing perusing the titles on offer. Hilarious. There needs to be a standard about going beyond standard definition. Thank you for helping define it!